Sometimes I wish I could trade bodies with someone (specifically Noah, but anyone non-pregnant would work) just so they could experience all of the physical weirdness going on right now.
Today, for example, we went for a walk. I love walks, actually - I make Noah go for one with me every weekend if possible. The plan was to do just a quick circuit around the path, maybe an hour or so, just enough to get some sun and woods and exercise without being horrifically taxing. Alas, we got lost about an hour into it, and it turned into a two and a half hour walk.
This wasn't some leisurely meander on a level sidewalk either, I'll have you know. Living in close proximity to a military base has certain perks, one of which is access to the kick-ass trails that the marines do PT on, and that's where we were today. So picture long steep hills, ankle-deep sand, and lots of cool obstacles (which I bypass but usually get Noah to attempt for my amusement). It's a great place for a walk as long as you make sure to time it so you don't get trampled by the morning PT folk - in the woods, lots of animals and weird vegetation (pine trees and cacti), a good mix of sun and shade (until you've been walking for 90 minutes, at which point it suddenly turns into nonstop blasting UV rays of damnation). We eventually did find our way out, due to awesome backtracking skills and a great deal of patience. On the up side, we did see a pretty cute lizard.
Now, of course, I am hobbling like an old woman. Everything between my knees and my ribcage feels like someone laid me down and carefully worked me over with the tender touch of a sledgehammer. Due to an artful combination of lower back pain, pubic bone pain, and a pelvis that feels like it's not actually attached to the rest of my body, it took me a good two minutes to get off the couch last time I had to pee (and alas, I know the next time won't be far away).
So yeah, I know it's my own fault for deciding to take a hike at 9 months pregnant, but right now I'd love to hand this body off to someone else and see what they make of it.